Psalms 3:3-4 But You, Lord, are a shield around me, my glory, and the One who lifts up my head. I cry aloud to the Lord, and He answers me from His holy mountain.
This is my life’s verse. I’m a moody girl, I can admit that. My moods can sway in the gentlest breeze. I try to remain positive most of the time, but I tell ya, it is a lot of work! And keeping up that facade ultimately leads to being found out. Like the Wizard of Oz hiding behind the curtain, the truth of who I really am is exposed eventually.
The biggest facade I wear is the one that says I am always a happy, cheerful girl. Take a peek at the wizard behind the curtain of a big smile and you will see a melancholy girl with pensive eyes. I can easily fall into a gloomy state which leads to the desire to isolate myself from everything and everyone.
It was during one such spell that I cried out to God and asked Him for help with this aspect of my personality. I was led to this verse. He is my shield when the world is too much, and like a loving father, He lifts my head. I picture the sadness causing me to look down to the ground and avoid eye contact, but He gently cups my chin and lifts my gaze to Him, as if to say, “Chin up, Buttercup! Hold your head high because you are the daughter of a King and a jewel in my crown.”
Have you ever cried out to God and received a tangible answer? Do you have a life verse?
Day 23 – It is leftover Tuesday. I finished off the cauliflower pizza and some salad for breakfast. I have no respect for the typical “breakfast foods”. I eat whatever I feel like eating for breakfast, and other than oatmeal, it is normally left overs. My breakfast was very filling so I didn’t eat again until my smoothie for work. I also took a fruit salad and a coffee to work. For dinner I had lentil tacos over spaghetti squash it that was very tasty!
Tomorrow is my day off and I am happy. My old bones do not recover from a night of waiting tables like they did at one time. Getting older is rough. Whoever said age is a state of mind never limped around with a sciatic flare up, or hobbled around with plantar fasciitis making every step feel like you are walking on a bed of nails. I must say, however, that eating better and removing some of the inflammation in my body has really helped with my aches and pains. I mean, I almost feel 35 again! Okay, more like 40, but there is hope that it will get better. (For the record, I am 43). Whoa, 43… I am hit with mixed emotion by that number. On the one hand, I feel ancient, like I could star in the sequel to Driving Miss Daisy. On the other hand, that number seems so young, not even yet 45. What do I have to complain about? I’m spry, hip, with it, right? I even have purple hair, so I must still be young. Just don’t ask my kids, because according to them I am a fossil who never knew what it was like to be young and carefree.
Do you act your age? Do you feel your age? Or do you tell your age it can suck your big toe? Not very lady like, I know, but you know you were thinking it, too.
Time for bed! Day 23 – withering away.